Alabama 49, Arkansas 14

UPDATED & BUMPED: Butch Bornt, who describes himself as president of the “Restraining Order Wing of the Sela Ward Fan Club,” e-mails to remind us that the Hollywood hottie was a Crimson Tide cheerleader back in the day (center in this photo):

Meanwhile, Instapundit is getting e-mail taunts after his Vols lost 30-6 to Florida. An amazing thing, when you think about it. We are at war with murderous jihadis, the economy teeters on the verge of collapse and polls show that Barack Obama may be the next president of the United States, but if you’re an SEC football fan, your mood is far more dependent on how your team did on Saturday.

I’m prepared to predict that Tennessee fans will be profoundly depressed after Oct. 25. (If you want to avoid that downer, Professor, I’ll be happy to take those tickets off your hands.)

In addition to football, the SEC is also a powerhouse of blog taunting. Which reminds me, why hasn’t UGA alum Mary Katharine Ham started taunting me about next week’s game yet? Doesn’t the Weekly Standard allow football taunting?

Roll, Tide, Roll!

Alabama (4-0) led 35-7 at halftime, and six of the Crimson Tide’s seven touchdowns covered at least 25 yards.

Giving up two touchdowns is bad — the defense has already allowed three touchdowns this season — but I’ll take it for a conference opener. Imagine those poor Arkansas fans having to hear the mighty Million Dollar Band play this song seven times in one game!

Yea, Alabama!

Yea, Alabama! Drown ’em Tide!
Every ‘Bama man’s behind you,
Hit your stride.
Go teach the Bulldogs to behave,
Send the Yellow Jackets to a watery grave.
And if a man starts to weaken,
That’s a shame!
For Bama’s pluck and grit have
Writ her name in Crimson flame.
Fight on, fight on, fight on, men!
Remember the Rose Bowl we’ll win then.
So roll on to victory,
Hit your stride,
You’re Dixie’s football pride, Crimson Tide!

Hey, now,what’s that whining sound I hear coming from over ’round Athens, Georgia? Sounds like some ‘Dawgs who know they’re about to get stomped by a herd of wild elephants!

Georgia is ranked No. 3, but some folks in Athens say the Bulldogs should be No. 2. That’s right. And ‘Bama’s gonna beat the No. 2 out of them ‘Dawgs

UPDATE: Compare and contrast the University of Alabama and the University of Georgia:

‘Nuff said.

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