Archive for March 23rd, 2009

March 23, 2009

How to Speak to an Obamanoid . . .

. . . if you must:

“Hopefully, we can make an impact,” said Ms. Kenkare, as she approached a house armed with a stack of pledges and the aim of helping Mr. Obama win the votes he needs to pass his record $3.6 trillion budget.
In what’s shaping up to be a different kind of permanent campaign than is usually waged by Washington’s political consultants, thousands of volunteers across the country took to the streets over the weekend at Obama’s behest. They knocked on doors, stood in front of stores to collect signatures, and urged their neighbors to call their congressman.
With this canvassing operation, the Obama administration is taking traditional presidential strategies for building public support to a whole new level.

(Via Memorandum.) Now, we have previously discussed what to do if you are called by a Democratic fund-raiser. You are urged to study that method, and apply it rigorously if an Obamanoid shows up at your front door. However, since there seem to be some blog readers too stupid to know when to hit a man’s tip jar, let me make explicit how to deal with this situation:

  • Be welcoming and friendly. “Oh, I’m so glad you came by!” Invite them in, ask them to have a seat. Be the gracious host and offer them snacks and beverages. Assure them that you will do anything to help Obama.
  • Remember your Prime Objectives. Your objectives are (a) to waste the maximum amount of the Obamanoid volunteer’s time, and (b) to ensure that, when they eventually leave, they are as demoralized as possible. Only by intense concentration on these twin objectives can you be fully successful.
  • Assure them that you are a loyal Democrat who voted for Obama. The fact that your address is on their clipboard list means that somehow, somewhere along the line, you clicked a link or signed up for something that makes them think you’re one of them. Do nothing to spoil this valuable illusion.
  • Express extreme disappointment with the president’s disastrous beginning in office. You are disappointed — nay, you are heartbroken beyond words — by Obama’s failure to fulfill his campaign promises of balancing the budget, cutting taxes, etc. You sincerely admire Obama, but are certain that there must be some bad advisors at the White House, or some evil influences among congressional Democrats, who have led Your Dear Leader astray. (Bonus points for you ladies if you can actually work yourself into a crying jag.)
  • Draw them out. When you mourn that Obama is destroying the Democratic Party (and remind them again that you have devoted your life to being a loyal Democrat, of course) the Obamanoids will protest to the contrary. Let them talk. Hear them out. Waste their time. Engage them. “Let me get you some more sweet tea, dear . . .” And then find some new angle of attack.
  • Be specific. Try to point out specific instances of Obama policies that will hurt women, minorities, the elderly, gays, etc. If you’ve got an elderly relative who’s had his retirement savings wiped out by the market decline, make sure you blame Obama for that, and don’t let the clipboard carriers persuade you that it’s all Bush’s fault.
  • Know where to put the knife. Nothing, absolutely nothing, will guarantee a long rant from an Obamanoid as much as when you compare Obama to George W. Bush. “I can’t believe it! I’ve been a Democrat all my life, and I never thought I’d live to see a Democrat president doing this to decent, hard-working Democrats like me. He’s ruining my life! It’s like he’s a closet Republican or something. He’s just like that damn George Bush!”
  • Save your best for last. When, after you have wasted as much of his time as possible, the Obamanoid finally looks at his watch and says he must leave, be apologetic. “I’m sorry if I’ve been a little negative.” Try to get the Obamanoid’s contact information, “just in case I need to talk to you again.” And as you walk them to the door, express regret that they are being “forced to work for those damned bastards” who have backstabbed Obama and are destroying the Democratic Party that you have supported your entire life. And then . . .

“Uh, by the way, dearie . . . how much are the Democrats paying you to do this? . . . Volunteer? You mean you’re doing this for nothing? When that idiot Tim Geithner is giving all those billions of dollars to those greedy Republican bankers and Wall Street fat cats? Oh, how can they do this to a loyal Democrat like you? Those heartless sellout bastards.”

Good luck and Godspeed.

UPDATE: Linked at NewsAlert. Linked by Paco.

March 23, 2009

Gay ‘tolerance’: Transgenders violently attacked by lesbians at DC bar

No, this is not an Onion satire. It’s news so bizarrely real you couldn’t possibly make it up:

When Mitch Graffeo entered Dupont’s Fab Lounge shortly before closing on Feb. 28, he hadn’t been to a lesbian club in more than a decade. Graffeo, 40, was only stopping in to pick up a friend, 29-year-old Jamie, at the conclusion of the gay bar’s weekly lesbian night. Graffeo and Jamie, both transgender men, were two of only a handful of men in a club full of women.

(OK, just to clarify the nomenclature a bit here: Mitch and Jamie were both born women, and are at different stages of the hormones-and-surgery business of female-to-male sex change treatment.)

As the lights went up [at closing time], a group of women took a sudden interest in Jamie. Slim and boyish, Jamie had only recently begun to transition from female to male, and they wanted to know what he was.
Graffeo watched the women surround Jamie. “They were grabbing him, saying, ‘What are you, a boy or a girl?'” Graffeo says. “They were very interested and excited, grabbing his crotch and his chest,” says Graffeo. When Jamie asked the women to leave him alone, they closed in tight around him. Jamie “wiggled his way out,” and the two men funneled toward the door with the rest of the last-call crowd.
Once outside, one of the women refused to let her curiosity subside. “She jumped on his back a bit and put him in a headlock,” says Graffeo. Then, she reopened the line of questioning. “She was saying, ‘What are you, come on, tell me, what the f—,'” Graffeo says. Jamie wiggled out again. The woman persisted.
When Graffeo stepped between them, the woman “tried to punch around” him. Graffeo pulled out his cell phone and announced he was calling the police. The woman grabbed the phone from his hand and used it to pound Graffeo in the head and neck. “She said, ‘You’re not calling anybody,'” Graffeo says. Meanwhile, “a second gal was just pummeling Jamie, hitting him on his head, his neck, his arms.” Soon, a car pulled up, and the women jumped inside. Jamie was left with bruises and a concussion. A week later, “he’s still purple,” says Graffeo. “He’s not black and blue, he’s purple all over.”

Kinda rainbow, you might say. Now, if you insensitive morons ever stop laughing long enough, you might want to read the rest of the story, which includes a rather delicate and ponderous discussion of gay-on-gay violence, a problem more widespread than the Poofter PR brigades in the MSM would like to admit.

Political correctness demands that gay people can only be betrayed in the news media as either (a) heroic role models, courageously living their lives on their own terms, or (b) martyred victims, suffering hateful abuse at the hands of cretinous homophobic Christofascist Republicans.

An examination of the circumstances surrounding the murder of Matthew Shepard doesn’t support that reading. Shepard was a dweeby rich college kid rolled by a couple of petty hoodlums who almost certainly never heard of James Dobson. But if you try to argue with the MSM-approved “Martyrdom of Saint Matthew” narrative, it only proves that you’re a cretinous homophobic Christofascist Republican. So most people don’t bother to argue.

Even further unsubstantiated by evidence is the MSM-approved notion of the “gay community” as one big happy Sister Sledge “We Are Family” singalong, where the leather daddies and the flannel-shirted bulldykes and the glitter-encrusted drag queens all rejoice in celebration of their shared gayness. Complete hogwash.

When you’ve got a couple of gals so butch they’re willing to inject testosterone and undergo mastectomies to pass as men, and yet they cannot visit a lesbian bar for fear they’ll be beaten up — well, in light of such an incident, I think the absurdity of “We Are Family” solidarity is adequately demonstrated.

And if you think these two F2Ms “transmen” got it bad, just imagine the riot that would have ensued if a couple of male-to-female trannygirls should try to pass themselves off as actual women in a lesbian bar.

So, just as we can sneer at the ideological nonsense of feminism (Equality Is For Ugly Losers), we can also chortle derisively at the homosupremacist propaganda that would have us believe gay people enjoy a monopoly on enlightened tolerance.

March 23, 2009

Motivational Videos for Ungrateful B*stards Who Don’t Hit the F***ing Tip Jar

By Gunnery Sgt. Hartman
Guest Blogger

You sorry, no-good, worthless maggots don’t deserve this man’s good blogging. Sitting in your pathetic little cubicle, getting paid thousands of dollars a month by The Man, wasting time and money bored-at-the-office reading blogs — and you don’t even have the g–d— common courtesy to hit a man’s tip jar?

You disgust me! You’re lucky I don’t jump out of this computer screen, tear off your head and s— down your neck! Now turn up the sound and click the video, maggot!

March 23, 2009

Obama to Eufala, Alabama: F— You!

They vote Republican anyway, so screw those inbred banjo-picking moonshine-swilling hillbillies:

At a time when the federal government is spending billions of stimulus dollars to stem the tide of U.S. layoffs, should that same government put even more Americans out of work by buying cheaper foreign products?
In this case, Chinese condoms. . . .
In a move expected to cost 300 American jobs, the government is switching to cheaper off-shore condoms, including some made in China.
“Of course, we considered how many U.S. jobs would be affected by this move,” said a USAID official who spoke on the condition that he would not be named. But he said the reasons for the change included lower prices (2 cents versus more than 5 cents for U.S.-made condoms) and the fact that Congress dropped “buy American language” in a recent appropriations bill.
Besides, he said, the sole U.S. supplier — an Alabama company called Alatech — had previous delivery problems under the program. . . .
Fannie Thomas, who has been making AIDS-preventing condoms in southeastern Alabama for nearly 40 years in the small town of Eufaula.
“We pay taxes down here, too, and with all this stimulus money going to save jobs, it seems to me like they (the U.S. government) should share this contract so they can save jobs here in America,” Thomas said. . . .
In fact, the government is close to accepting condoms from two offshore companies: Unidus Corp., which makes condoms in South Korea, and Qingdao Double Butterfly Group, which makes them in China.

How you like that, Alabama? See what you get for voting Republican, you pellegra-and-hookworm-infested crackers? Congratulations! You’ve been shafted by Hope. And they didn’t even have the common courtesy to give you a reach-around.

(H/T: Memeorandum; see also Reason Hit & Run and the show-tune-quoting Instapundit.)

UPDATE: “Not quite shovel-ready,” if you know what I mean, and I think you do. Nudge-nudge.

March 23, 2009

New book: MELTDOWN

Got an e-mail from Human Events with a special promotion of Profesor Thomas Woods’s new book: Meltdown: A Free-Market Look at Why the Stock Market Collapsed, the Economy Tanked, and Government Bailouts Will Make Things Worse. From the e-mail:

President Obama rammed through his new stimulus bill, warning of an irreversible recession if Congress failed to act.
But bestselling author Thomas E. Woods Jr. warns that Obama’s “stimulus package” will do far more damage to our economy than even the Republicans in Congress realize.
In his New York Times bestseller, Meltdown, Woods shows how this new bailout (just like last year’s bailout) will quickly drive our nation deeper into recession.

See? Another example of why I can’t score the big bucks as a writer. I made the mistake of boiling it down to three words: It Won’t Work.

Of course, for those of you who haven’t studied economics enough to know why it won’t work (hello, President Obama!) Professor Woods will certainly give you your money’s worth. He is also the author of the huge bestseller, The Politically Incorrect Guide to Amerian History.

March 23, 2009

‘Would you like to live naked . . .’

My blog-fu efficiency is being cramped by e-mail inbox overload. You have no idea the crap I get:

Was winter good for you? If not, please read on.
Would you like to live naked, warm, safe and whole, any time of year?
It is easy.
Cambium is a holistic, naturist settlement that is being developed in the Caribbean where people gather to share a life or a moment close to nature. If you long to discover how to grow spiritually in an environment that totally respects our serenity as humans, you can. The organic cultivation and preparation of food, management of natural energy, growth of understanding of our wholeness and its importance to our well-being are central to the ethos of Cambium. This email may be the key to unlock a fulfilment that your spirit is now ready for.
Please visit cambiumbene.com to find out more. You can acquire a substantial plot of land for less than the price of a car, where you can build your own eco-friendly lodge in this beautiful protected domain, where the wearing of clothes is not required, all year round. With central facilities at your disposal, such as restaurant, shop, clinics, library, theatre, sports facilities, miles of gorgeous countryside, meditation spaces, pools and more, could this be the place to honour your real values?
Opportunities abound to work, live, learn, teach or just holiday in our huge unique environment. If the fruits of materialism and capitalism are not rewarding you, or if you’ve simply had enough of cold winters, consider Cambium. We’re not dogmatic and have no axe to grind. We seek to provide a catalyst for enlightenment, fun and happiness, at one with our origins deep in Nature.
If you do visit the web site, and I hope you do, (you have nothing to loose) please use the home page to request our free document to find out more about Cambium. You have everything to gain.
Love and peace
Francois
If a naturist holiday appeals to you, please consider this message from our friends at Castaways Travel.
Castaways is announcing its next nude cruise….in France, 2010 from July 25 to August 1, 2010. See all the details at about this luxury river cruise on the Viking NEPTUNE [let’s skip the URL] The voyage is adults only and ……clothing optional as parts of the cruise will be docked at certain ports of call.

Also, apparently by signing up for Facebook, I automatically qualify for solicitations like these:

“Are YOU Interested?”
8 NEW people like YOU on ‘Are You Interested?’. Click here to view them now!
These people recently said they like YOU:
Jihad, 18
“Click YES on me!”
VIEW MY PROFILE SEND ME A WINK SEND ME A GIFT
Mohammed, 18
“Click YES on me!”
VIEW MY PROFILE SEND ME A WINK SEND ME A GIFT
Erik, 22
“Click YES on me!”
VIEW MY PROFILE SEND ME A WINK SEND ME A GIFT
Arsany, 20
“Click YES on me!”
VIEW MY PROFILE SEND ME A WINK SEND ME A GIFT
—–
There are over 11,000,000 people on Are You Interested!
Browse New Members: Click here to Browse new members
Your Matches: Click here to view your Matches
Who Likes YOU: Click here to view who clicked YES on YOU
Your Settings: Click here to update your Settings

Riiiiiiiight. I’m a married father of six, and don’t plan to become a divorced father of six, although sometimes my wife threatens that she might decide to become the widowed mother of six (and any jury would rule it justifiable homicide). However, if I were disposed to risk my wife’s violent vengeance by indulging in hanky-panky, the last place I’d look for the opportunity is at some ridiculous online matchmaking site. So, as much as I hate to disappoint “Jihad,” “Mohammed,” “Erik” and all those other people who are so eager to meet me . . .

NO, I AM NOT INTERESTED!

March 23, 2009

Quick note on site traffic

Just making a quick note mainly for my own purposes: Late on Feb. 13, we passed 1 million cumulative visits. About 2 a.m. today, we passed 1.2 million, meaning it took about 37 days to add 1/5th of our second million. If that pace of traffic can be maintained for another 148 days, then . . . well, a goal of 2 million by Labor Day would seem reasonable, eh?

(Quick, Smitty — more Cthulhu!)

But in the wee A.M. hours (when I’m writing this, for later publication), traffic slows down for political blogging, and the SiteMeter tells you very interesting things about what keyword combinations the freaks are Googling for.

(Quick, Smitty — more Miley Cyrus!)

Hey, what the heck, some celebrity gossip:

Totally random. But at 3 a.m. sometime months or even years from now, when a freak is Googling “miley+cyrus+hooker+bikini+gay+photo,” I’ll get that random Google hit. And hits is hits, beyotches.

March 23, 2009

No, Mr. Colmes: It Really Does Bite

by Smitty

Alan Colmes remains a partisan re-arranger of deckchairs on a colossal metaphor:

Even now, Obama is being accused by conservatives of talking down the economy, and fear-mongering when he is doing exactly the opposite. And when he expresses optimism, he’s criticized for that, too.

Could it be that there is an increasing perception/gnawing sensation the POTUS is fiddling while Rome burns? Sure, the crisis wasn’t built overnight, and has been caused and analyzed by people with more combined degrees than a magnetic compass. But for those of us simpletons, here are just a couple of pictures for discussion:



Source: Perot Charts

The federal budget is increasingly spoken for. A quick regression across those charts tells me that if you haven’t told me the plan to de-fang the Federal government, you haven’t told me much. Oh, you want to increase the depth of the Fed’s bite? Are you out of your copulating mind, sir?

Then there is household debt, really close to the GDP. This is not a partisan problem. After partying like a rock star, there will be a hangover.



Source: Fabius Maximus

Somewhere in between fear mongering and pollyanna is the stoic assumption of responsibility that’s required. But that would be a conservative response, and we’ll thus have to wade through a few more years of sewer pipe to get there. Alan, you earn your bread cheerleading for the wrong side. Ponder the Constitution and repent.

Let us keep Barak Obama, the man, in our prayers. There are already enough “banana republic” effects occurring, without venturing into the darker, unspeakable ones. As for the Obama Administration’s policies … let the Tea Parties roll!

March 23, 2009

Rachel Lucas on dealing with a socialist broadband Internet monopoly

“Someone, who I shall never name because they are close to me and I love them, told me a few weeks before we moved here [to the U.K.] that ‘there are good things about socialism, you know.’ I would like for that person to now come here and have to do a job that depended on the national monopoly of a totally incompetent entity. I would like that a whole lot. I think it would change her mind.”

March 23, 2009

‘Sheesh, the guy is Jimmy Carter . . .’

“This began, I’d argue, from the first moment. He punted on the inaugural. Everybody ran around like crazy trying to praise it because if Barack Obama couldn’t give a speech then what?”
Michael Wolff, New York Magazine

(H/T: Mark Steyn via Pundette.) Conservatives are understandably schadenfreudelicious that liberals have belatedly begun to recognize that Hope is no substitute for either experience or competence. So excuse me while I harsh your mellow, as Mike would say.

Who is to blame for the Obama administration? Republicans.

Karl Rove was right when he said, circa 2002-04, that America was on the brink of a potential “Permanent Republican Majority.” It took a thousand Republican mistakes to fumble away that advantage, to allow the Democrats to recapture Congress in ’06 and then elect this hubristic Harvard-educated idiot to the White House.

Just as Watergate and the politically tone-deaf incompetence of Gerald Ford gave us the first Jimmy Carter, and just as the ham-handedness of Bush 41 gave us Bill Clinton, so the blunders of Bush 43 and the disastrous Maverick candidacy gave us the Obama debacle.

At some point, Republicans are going to have to wise up, take a good hard look at the internal sources of their woes, and begin to hold people responsibility for the kind of unforced policy errors and clueless political fuckuperry that resulted in Obama getting 53% of the popular vote and 365 Electoral College votes. He is the Democrat that incompetent Republicans put in the White House, just as Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid are the Democrats that incompetent Republicans put in charge of the House and Senate.

Schaden me no freudes, my Republican friends. Get to work figuring out how to beat the Evil Coalition of Liars and Fools, and crush them so badly they can’t possibly come back again to destroy America’s freedom and prosperity.