Allah hates me

He really, really hates me. I don’t even want to begin to explain. If I wasn’t sitting here suffering slow death by conjunctivitis, I might explain. But the dude hates me, and I’ve never even met him.

I’m going back to bed.

(Maybe he’s speedophobic?)

UPDATE: Laura loves me! Pundette loves me! Matthew Yglesias . . . no, wait, he went to Harvard.

UPDATE II: Troglopundit loves . . . cute little bunnies?

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