Archive for ‘Dr. Helen’

May 19, 2009

Deconstructing Fatherhood

by Smitty

Change can be good. The Constitution as initially ratified had glaring flaws. These have been fixed, albeit at a price.
Change for its own sake, in contrast, lays waste to what is good and gives damn-all in return. The symbol “marriage” has been under siege. At least its defenders are living enough to cry foul, which is more than can be said for the victims in the abortion mills.
Recently making waves is Harry Knox, as reported by CNSNews:

A controversial member of President Barack Obama’s faith-based council said that part of the administration’s role in promoting responsible fatherhood should include moving beyond America’s “heteronormative view of fatherhood.”

Putting him in context, it’s almost possible that he has a point:

“Responsible fatherhood offers us an immense opportunity to speak to a real need in the country,” said Knox, director of the faith and religion program at the Human Rights Campaign, a homosexual rights group, during the PBS interview broadcast on its Religion & Ethics Newsweekly show.
“It’ll be challenging to do that for instance in ways that are not dismissive of the tremendous gifts of single mothers; not to sort of hold a heteronormative view of fatherhood up as the only model,” said Knox.

I suppose it’s the phrase “only model” that’s the sticking point.
Really, Knox: an XY chromosomal makeup for the role is an invariant for fatherhood. You can’t have that any other way, an more than you can have a marriage composed of other than a male and a female. I like to quote Abe Lincoln in reply to the attempt at implying an alternative Where None Exists:

“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn’t make it a leg.”

Knox nearly has a point, that we do not need to go around denigrating single mothers. My father was deployed for such a chunk of my childhood that she was a de facto single mom. God forbid the sad conditions of the Carter Administration return to afflict our military like that again. There are plenty of other women who’ve done admirable jobs when men decided to get their Springsteen on. However, the sin of sad, overgrown boys is beside the point of defending the crucial institution of fatherhood. Society sinks as spinally deficient males like Knox fail to keep the boat bailed amidst the flood of nonsense.
What is the reward for Knox-ian error? Dr. Helen provides an answer:

Mr. Lewis’s account of becoming a father to his three children, begins promisingly. “At some point in the last few decades, the American male sat down at the negotiating table with the American female and — let us be frank — got fleeced,” he writes.
The poor sucker agreed to take on responsibility for all sorts of menial tasks — tasks that his own father was barely aware of — and received nothing in return. If he was hoping for some gratitude, he was mistaken. According to Mr. Lewis: “Women may smile at a man pushing a baby stroller, but it is with the gentle condescension of a high officer of an army toward a village that surrendered without a fight.”

Admittedly, I’m still not a father. There are some medical reasons, as well as hope for the future. One way or another, I’ll join that elite group. And when I do, I’ll gladly do my share of the menial tasks. It’s a part of the experience. But I will do it in such a way as to underscore that the heteronormative view of fatherhood is the only model, Mr. Knox. If the daughters want Pride & Prejudice, you know me and the boys are chasing it with The Terminator. Lest they become wasted modern lickspittles instead of men.

Update: The Dead Hand has a more humorous take.

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April 8, 2009

Checkbook Daddies

by Smitty

Here are two intelligent ladies going on and on about women who become pregnant under coercive circumstances.

Amy: Your best bet is not to sleep with them

Crucial questions that neither one seems capable of addressing are:

  1. Why are we here? and
  2. How does your answer to #1 drive your approach to sexuality?

I’m being unfair to the ladies, becuase they are beginning post facto on the point. The bundle of joy has arrived. The man has not been consulted, yet will legally be held financially accountable for a couple of decades.
The point to be made here, in terms of attacking the general problem, is that neglecting the root causes of issues is the modern approach to generating a “self-licking ice cream cone” situation where the problem can be maintained indefinitely. Expanded. Books, conferences, careers.

Amy: I just want it to be fair

Amy, fa(re|ir) is what you pay to ride a bus. Manhood is about more than stand-up urination and upper body strength. If a boy is getting busy with a woman not his wife, with whom he’s not fully ready to enjoy the consequences and the pleasure, then a man he’s certainly not.
Amy and Helen, your seeming disinterest in even considering marriage and faith as important inputs to the discussion is symptomatic of societal decline. Let me help:

He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?–Micah 6:8

One only reason this problem seems so intractable is that you haven’t started where the solutions begin. 😉